How Not to Be a Dick

(To be sung in any key where the truth still sounds good.)

Verse 1:
When the world feels small and cruel,
And every fool’s a mirror,
Pause your tongue, recall the rule—
Kindness makes things clearer.

Chorus:
Don’t be a dick, it’s easy, you’ll see—
Hold doors for the weary, let others be free.
A moment of grace is a lifetime of peace,
And fools find no joy when their tempers increase.

Verse 2:
If someone trips, don’t mock the fall,
You’ll stumble soon, my friend.
The laughter kind should lift us all,
Not wound to prove you win.

Chorus (repeat)
Don’t be a dick, it’s simple and fair—
No soul grows taller by climbing despair.
The loudest ego is the smallest of men,
Be kind, then kind again.

Bridge:
The world’s a test of patience thin,
A crowded bus, a storm within.
So breathe, don’t bite, and keep your grin—
That’s where decency begins.

Final refrain:
Don’t be a dick, sing it proud and plain—
The wise plant peace and harvest no pain.
If common sense be holy writ,
Then love is law, and that’s the bit.